


Time on Your Own

by Starlinghue



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Road Trips, Slow Build, csa mentions, past emotional abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-22 03:13:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9580031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starlinghue/pseuds/Starlinghue
Summary: The summer had forged a distance between them, and something was obviously weighing Archie down.Or, the one where they actually went on the 4th of July road trip.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i have a lot of mixed feelings about this series, but the Archie characters will forever be close to my heart, so behold, the fic that became more than i ever expected it to be

The plan had been to leave Riverdale at nine that morning, but Jughead heard the familiar grumble of Archie's jalopy coming up his driveway at quarter past six. Peering out his bedroom window, Jughead saw Archie staring up at him from his car. With an obviously forced smile, Archie waved at Jughead to come down.

Something was up with Archie. Since the beginning of June, there had been a noticeable change in his behaviour. He seemed off, more grown up. At first Jughead assumed he was just bummed out from working in the construction yard all day, or maybe he was aware his body was changing under the labor faster than his mind could keep up. That didn't seem to be it, though Archie was becoming increasingly more distressed as the summer passed on. He flinched when Jughead mentioned school, and he was always plucking away at his guitar, a far off look in his eyes.

And today, the third of July, Archie had shown up ahead of schedule for their road trip, just as the sun was beginning to peek over the trees.

The jumpstart in plans didn't bother Jughead, since he had packed two nights in advance. Honestly he was a lot more excited for the trip more than he let on. The idea was to spend the Fourth of July weekend driving through the state, visiting new cities, new diners, and then spending the night camped out at Bar Harbour. He and Archie were splitting the fees, they had enough for just one night. They would see the open stars before the fireworks began splitting off.

Scribbling a quick note to his parents, Jughead got dressed, threw on his beanie, grabbed a few bags of chips and headed out the door with his backpack and his two-person tent rolled up under one arm. As he approached Archie's car, Jughead could see his friend watching him over the steering wheel, and his awkward smile melted into a genuine one.

Truthfully, he had been worried Archie would bail last-minute. Archie was not only withdrawing emotionally, he had actually cancelled plans to hang out a few times, and Jughead was beginning to suspect if it was really just extra shifts at the yard that was keeping him so busy.

"Sorry I'm so early," Archie said as Jughead climbed into the passenger seat. "It's just, I woke up and I wanted to get out of here right away."

Looking him over, Jughead saw a flighty, nervous twitch in Archie's entire body. Something was wrong, and he needed to drive.

"Let's go," Jughead mumbled, knowing not to press too hard. Archie would tell him what was eating at him later, when he was calmed down and had the roll of the road under him. "I might fall asleep, wake me up with the radio if I do."

"Okay," Archie grinned at him softly, and Jughead knew that he would just let him sleep. The jalopy grumbled down and out of the driveway, and Jughead was soon lulled unconscious by the familiar twists of the town roads, just as the sun began to throw colour into the streets.

\---

Jughead didn't dream, he wasn't asleep long enough for anything to conjure itself up in his head. When he eventually stirred himself awake, they were about an hour from the Riverdale's limits. Driving down a country road and passing endless miles of evergreen trees. Archie was singing along quietly to one of the 90s tapes that came with the car's old stereo.

_"So if you want to love me, then darling don't refrain, or I'll just end up walking in the cold November rain."_

Archie's voice was quiet, not the kind of abrasive and charming kind you would here in most pop songs. He sang like he was smaller, like he was whispering a secret.

Jughead kept his eyes closed and just listened to him, melting into the sound of it. When they were kids, Jughead used to hate it when Archie sang, but in his defense, he was a lot louder and out of tune then. When Archie's voice dropped it became gradually less annoying, and soon Jughead just grew used to Archie humming or chanting quietly while they did homework, or ate burgers, or were lounging in his treehouse. Jughead was the one who gave Archie his guitar, since his childhood lessons had only lasted a week and the poor thing served no purpose in his house. He'd never forgotten the smile on Archie's face when he had offered the instrument up, the way Archie had hugged him with one arm and breathlessly laughed in thanks.

As the song trickled to a close, Jughead blinked himself fully awake, giving Archie the benefit of believing he hadn't been listening.

"Morning," Archie greeted, shooting Jughead a much calmer smile than the frazzled look he had downed that morning.

"Where are we?" Jughead yawned, stretching his limbs as much as the car allowed.

"Nearing Houlton," Archie replied, "We'll be able to get on the freeway soon, want to stop and get breakfast first?"

"Is that even a question?" Jughead arched an eyebrow, and Archie laughed.

They stopped at gas-station that was next to an IHOP, the only sign of civilization before the freeway exit. It early, so the diner wasn't too crowded, though there were a few families piled into booths, probably headed places for the Fourth.

After being seated, they were quickly greeted by a beautiful, butterscotch blonde, bespectacled waitress. She was maybe in her early thirties, and she smiled at the boys cheerfully as she asked for their orders.

Jughead was halfway through asking for a triple stack of chocolate-chip pancakes when he saw the expression on Archie's face. Haunted, almost frightened, Archie was looking at the lovely waitress as if she'd grown a second head.

"Anything for you, sweetheart?" The waitress turned to Archie, blissfully unaware of his ghostlike expression, which he awkwardly covered up under her blue gaze.

"I'll have the oatmeal, please." Archie murmured, gluing his eyes to the table. "And a glass of water."

"Alrighty," she chirped, and then bounced on to the next table.

Once she was out of sight, Jughead couldn't help but asking, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Archie lied, smiling bleakly. "She just startled me, that's all."

Jughead desperately wanted to pry, to ask Archie what was really going on, but he couldn't. He was afraid to upset him any further, so he quickly changed to subject to the latest mystery novel he was reading. Jughead often told Archie a play-by-play of every book he read. Since Archie didn't read very much on his own time, he often vicariously followed the stories through Jughead.

"So it was the cousin!" Archie exclaimed after Jughead finished summarizing the last few chapters he'd read, "I knew it, you can never trust the guy that drinks too much in those books."

"They're almost always guilty, you're right. I was hoping his sister killed him, that would've been more interesting." Jughead shrugged, digging into the last third of his pancakes, which had been served a few minutes prior. Archie had almost finished his oatmeal, and was nudging the last few lumps with his spoon.

"I'm glad we're doing this," Archie said after a few beats of amicable silence (except for Jughead's chewing), "It's nice to get out of town for a couple days."

"Me too," Jughead found himself smiling, "Riverdale, for all it's domestic and hallmark-card worthy aesthetic, is suffocating as hell."

They laughed together in that IHOP, the morning sun flickering through the clouds, chasing away any hint of rain.

It was a three hour drive to Bar Harbour, giving Jughead plenty of time to let Archie relax. He would ask him what was wrong as soon as they were at the campground, and the tent was set up and they would be going on a nice, lazy afternoon hike. It did not escape Jughead's conscience that he was essentially plotting an interrogation, but he was going crazy seeing Archie so out of sorts and not knowing the reason why. After all, Jughead had known all of Archie's problems since kindergarten, it was imbedded into him to want to lend an ear or whatever Archie needed. And right now, Archie needed this trip. They both did.

Leaving early had spared them of any hard traffic, allowing Archie to merge onto the freeway seamlessly. He promised Jughead the jalopy had just been tuned up the previous evening by his Dad, who had also given Archie some emergency cash in case anything went wrong with the old clunker. They both had fully charged cellphones if worse came to worst, and Mr Andrews would have to tow them back home.

"Shall we begin a riveting game of I spy?" Jughead asked, staring at the horizon. "I've been told it's a must for all road trips."

"My parents liked the story game," Archie drummed his fingers across the steering wheel, "You know, the one where everyone says a word until it becomes utter nonsense?"

Jughead smirked, "Okay, let's try it."

"Once." "Upon." "A." "Twilight." "There." "Was." "An." "Explosion!"

"Jughead!" Archie smothered his laughter, "That's so morbid!"

"It could've been a fun explosion," Jughead clicked his tongue, "You decided the ending, my friend."

"You're such a smartass," Archie scoffed, but he was grinning, his lips full and pink as peaches.

With a tightness in his chest, Jughead forced himself to look away, gazing instead at the trees through the passenger window. A green sea, the tide fluttering behind them.

 

\---

 

Two and a half bags of chips later, they made it to Bar Harbour, and five minutes after that, they were pulling up to Acadia National Park. It was a holiday weekend, so there were quite a few cars on their way in, but Jughead still felt like it was secluded. It was different from Riverdale, at least.

Jughead had booked their passes online a week in advance, so getting through the gate was a quicker process for them opposed to some of the cars ahead of them. When a park ranger greeted them at the security check, she squinted at them.

"College kids?"

"High school, ma'am." Archie replied, to which she gave an eye roll and checked the validity of their passes.

"Stay out of trouble." She sighed, gesturing for them to move the car along.

Once parked in a designated lot, it became a bit of a struggle to carry everything to their site. Archie had brought his guitar, a miniature, gas-powered grill, a bundle of blankets and a cooler full of water bottles, soda-pops and food. Jughead had brought the tent, some food of his own, and one extra large sleeping bag which would serve as the world's thinnest mattress. They shuffled in a heap of limbs and items, miraculously not dropping anything before they reached their site.

"And now," Jughead looked at their scattered mess of things in the dirt, "For the tent."

The weather was humid, but not unbearably so. Working up a sweat didn't take much effort. Assembling the tent took about half an hour due to some peg mix-ups, and Archie knocking things over. Once the damn thing was finally set up, Jughead was surprised by how small it was. It could still fit the two of them, but they would probably become entangled in their sleep, there was no leg room at all.

Trying not to think about becoming a human pretzel with his best friend, Jughead suggested he and Archie go check out the beach.

"I honestly forgot there was a beach!" Archie said excitedly, and soon they were walking downhill and towards the sand.

There were signs leading up to the shore promising a fireworks party the next day. Jughead almost wished he and Archie could stay for it, but they could only afford to camp for the one night. Fireworks in Riverdale wouldn't be so bad, Jughead supposed. Maybe he would see Betty at the town gathering, which would be nice since he hadn't really spoken to her since school was let out. Strangely, Jughead found himself missing her. They were sort of friends, and Archie used to talk about her all the time.

That had been one of the telltale signs something wasn't right with Archie: Betty withdrawal. As he did with Jughead, Archie had kept his distance from Betty all summer (apart from texting.)

Jughead was so close to asking, the words were in his throat. Even a simple 'How are you lately?' would've done the trick. But he couldn't seem to do it, not while Archie was babbling excitedly about the last time he'd seen the ocean.

The beach was better than they could've anticipated, with a perfect crescent curve out of the forest, and into the pale sand, and the glowing blue waves. For a moment, Jughead just stared at it, marvelling in the sheer feeling of infinite the ocean produced. Then he turned to look at Archie and saw that he had a trace of tears in his eyes.

"You see it on T.V and stuff all the time," Archie mumbled, blinking the tears back. "It's just... so much better in real life."

It was weird, Jughead thought, that Archie would be so moved by the water. It was even weirder that Jughead's chest felt like it was collapsing in on itself because of it.

"Come on, I'll race you down." Jughead nudged their shoulders together, then took off running.

They had left their sweaters and a very important beanie back in the tent, so Jughead didn't care if he soaked this particular t-shirt and pair of ripped jeans. He also didn't care that neither of them had thought to pack a towel. But he did care about his shoes, which he kicked off a few meters from the shoreline so they wouldn't get swept away. When he dared to look back, he saw Archie was right on his heels, and was too busy watching him football-charge his way to the sand to realize his foot was connecting with the water.

Startled, Jughead stumbled until the water was up to his knees, and had barely regained his balance when Archie tackled him hard and they fell forward with a scream and a splash.

Their heads were underwater for less than two seconds, but it was enough.

"Shit!" Jughead yelped scrambling to get back to his feet, "Holy fuck it's fucking cold!"

"Jug!" Archie was giggling, sitting in the water so it came up to just bellow his shoulders. "There's a kid!"

Sure enough, a little girl was splashing around at the other end of the beach, and the parents were glaring in Jughead's direction. In fact, the few people at the beach were all staring at them.

"Sorry," Jughead waved at them lamely, then he promptly shoved the laughing Archie underwater.

 

\---

 

With the taste of sea salt lingering on his lips, Jughead was eager to get back to their campsite and eat. Thankfully, no one had robbed them while they were gone, though the sites were far enough away that any criminal activity of the kind seemed overtaxing.

The two of them had been swimming for over an hour, and it was long past noon. Archie snapped a few photos of Jughead on his phone once they were sitting down in the grass, still soaking wet. Archie went on to use his cellphone data to google how on earth they were supposed to cook home fries on the mini-grill.

The fries were incredibly soft by the end of it, but Jughead was just happy to have some food in his system.

They took turns changing into dry sweatshirts and shorts in the tent after they ate, and then Archie decided it was time for him to practice guitar, giving Jughead some background noise while he finished reading his book.

As he read, Jughead wondered if he really needed to ask Archie what was wrong. It might've had something to do with his mom, and Jughead knew that wasn't really his business, and that it only hurt Archie more to talk about it. Even so, he couldn't shake the urge to pry, to at least offer Archie a chance to get things off his chest if he wanted to.

"You know you can talk to me, right?" Jughead said, so quietly he thought that Archie might not hear him over the strums of his guitar.

Hands hovering over the next cord, Archie looked up at Jughead like a deer in the headlights. An expression of sadness and guilt dawned on his freckled face.

"Listen," Jughead fumbled desperately, not wanting to scare him off. "I'm here if you need me, if something happened this summer, you can trust me. That's all I'm saying."

For a long moment, Archie stared at him in silence. In the distance, Jughead could hear the cicadas screaming more clearly than he could his own breath, which he soon realized he was holding.

"Something did happen," Archie finally said, clutching his guitar nervously. He quickly dropped his gaze to his feet, like he was ashamed. "You can't tell anyone."

"I would never," Jughead swore, and he meant it. He closed his book and sat up, giving Archie his full attention.

"It's a long story," Archie warned, balancing the guitar on his lap. "It started in June, on the twelfth, I think? I was on my way back from the yard after a really long shift, and it was that day with the really big rain storm. I was walking home, but I probably could've beat the rain if I jogged."

He drew his eyebrows together, as if mustering the courage to go on.

"Anyways, I was about halfway home when Ms Grundy drove past me. She recognizes me, rolls down her window and pulls over. Asked me how I was doing and whatever, then she offered me a ride home. I didn't think much of it, I was just happy not to walk."

Jughead felt the pit of his stomach sink in dread, and Archie continued his story.

"We were having a nice talk, and she, well, she looked a lot more laid back then she did in first semester, had her hair down and her glasses off. She was laughing at all my jokes, teasing me for getting handsome. Next thing I know her hand is on my thigh and she's pulling over."

For Archie's sake, Jughead didn't react verbally, didn't gasp or yell or say a damn thing. He kept quiet and listened, even though his body was screaming.

"And it was exciting, Jug. I'm not gonna lie to you, she was so gorgeous and she was.... touching me. I got caught up in the moment, and I thought maybe something was there, something real. And it happened more than once."

Archie's cheeks were burned red with shame, and Jughead knew that all their canceled plans, all those times Archie had surprise shifts, he was with her. An entire month, he was with her.

"But then it started to feel wrong," Archie's voice broke, and his hands trembled. "I thought I was in love with her, I felt like what we had was how it was supposed to feel. But we never talked, we just... we just hooked up. I tried to get her to talk to me but she would start kissing and it wasn't exciting anymore, it was just plain scary."

Slowly, Archie closed his eyes, probably cramming back tears again. "So I told her how I felt, I told her I cared about her. And she just... made it physical again, changed the subject with her body. It was so wrong for me that time I couldn't sleep, I just stared at the wall until the next morning. That was last weekend."

Jughead remembered texting Archie on Friday night, going without response until Monday morning. He now felt terrible for being angry at Archie during the radio silence.

"I broke it off," Archie said shakily, "Last night, I tried to see if I could save whatever it was I felt when we started, but she just. Touched my arms and chest. Told me to cancel my plans with you and come meet her in secret on the fourth. I couldn't take it anymore, I finally said no to her."

"So it's over?" Jughead finally spoke, struggling to keep his voice even.

"It's over," Archie confirmed, opening his eyes and meeting Jughead's gaze. He looked so upset, it was heartbreaking.

"You didn't do anything wrong," Jughead said with as much emphasis as he could, "You hear me Archie? You didn't do anything wrong."

"But what we did-"

"What she did, Archie. What she did to you was wrong. You didn't do anything wrong."

Tears finally started to spill over Archie's cheeks, "I could've stopped her sooner."

"You've stopped it now." Jughead whispered, scooting forward so that he could reach out and touch Archie's shoulder. "Have you told anyone else?"

"No," Archie croaked, wiping his wet face across his sleeves. "And I'm not going to, I promised her I wouldn't get her fired."

"She deserves to be fired!" Jughead couldn't help but snap, but thankfully Archie didn't flinch.

Instead, he leaned in for a very awkward hug, given there was a guitar between them.

"Don't tell anybody," Archie pleaded, "Please, Jug, no one needs to know it ever happened."

Defeated, Jughead wrapped his arms around Archie's shoulders and made the hug real, guitar division be damned. "I promise I won't, but thank you for telling me. I've been so worried about you, I knew something was wrong."

"You worried?" Archie laughed sadly, raising one hand to ruffle Jughead's hair from the back. "I knew you cared."

"Of course I fucking care," Jughead scoffed, "You're my best friend."

And though Jughead couldn't see it, he felt Archie's swift inhale, and knew that he was beginning to cry again. So they sat entwined, shielded by the privacy of the trees, and Archie Andrews sobbed his heart out.

 

\---

 

They walked up the mountain to see the sunset over the ocean, silent and pensive. 

After the crying, Archie had taken a moment alone to recollect himself at the outhouse, and came running back with the story of a giant spider. They were soon laughing and joking as if the previous hour had never happened, and they lasted that way until long after dinner (which entailed some very burned hot dogs.)

Jughead suggested the walk, and Archie had seemed excited to go. But they soon fell quiet, allowing the events of the day to really sink in.

They reached a great lookout point just as the sun dipped behind the pinkened sea, and the sky turned a bright orange and purple. It was stunning. Archie snapped a few pictures, and he even pressured Jughead into a selfie.

"I know I said this earlier," Archie murmured, staring out at the deep sea below them. "But I'm really glad I came on this trip."

Looking at Archie in the hue of the day's end, Jughead thought that Archie's red hair seemed like his own sun, and his freckles like constellations across his cheeks and neck.

Then he thought of everything terrible that Archie had endured over the summer, and he'd be damned if he wasn't going to protect him from that ever happening again.

"Yeah," Jughead said, "Me, too."

 

\---

 

One of their neighbouring sites was throwing a bonfire, and the woman hosting invited Archie and Jughead to have s'mores. A few other campers were there, mostly families, so Archie and Jughead bounced between talking to the children and the adults. It was nice to be near other people for a little while.

They returned to their own site smelling of campfire. Too lazy to walk to the outhouse, they both brushed their teeth at the edge of the dirt path, and spat the toothpaste into the woods, challenging each other on how far they could spew it. Once everything was cleaned up, and they were safe from any potential animal visitors, Archie all but collapsed into the claustrophobic tent, and Jughead struggled to slide in after him.

It was quiet for a long time before Jughead spoke, "You're not a freak, you know. For having it feel wrong."

Archie sighed, or grumbled.

"I don't," Jughead struggled for words, "I don't get excited. At all. Not like that. There were times when I tried to, well, I tried to do what all pubescent boys do. And it was absolutely awful."

Archie turned over on his side, facing Jughead in the dark tent. "And you just don't do it anymore?"

"No," Jughead confessed, his breath hitching. "I hate the way it feels."

"That's okay," Archie said quietly, "That's totally okay, you know that right?"

"It's still not considered normal," Jughead huffed, "I don't like girls, not like I'm supposed to. And I don't look at guys that way either."

"You don't have to look at anyone," Archie's voice was soft, and Jughead felt his hand reaching for him. Somewhere between their stomaches, Archie managed to lace their fingers together. "Hell, I don't know how I feel about sex, especially after what happened. It always felt strange and intense. It's just an adrenaline rush, and some people don't like that, but some people get addicted to it."

"That's really smart," Jughead found himself laughing. "You somehow always know what to say."

"You, too." Archie's words were said with a smile, "And Jug? I love you."

It was whispered so secretively, Jughead worried he'd imagined it. But from the squeeze of Archie's hand and the sweatiness of his palms, Jughead realized it was true.

"I love you, too." Jughead whispered back, and he was suddenly very aware of how close they were, and how he could feel Archie's breath on his cheek.

The last person Archie had kissed was Ms Grundy, and Jughead really didn't feel good about that, and maybe it was the closeness and the hand-holding, and Archie not calling him a freak, but Jughead nudged himself forward, slowly bonking noses with his friend. This way, he could play it off as an accident if he needed to.

But before he could even breathe, Archie was kissing him. His lips were so warm, mixing the flavour of cherry toothpaste and marshmallows. Jughead didn't feel weird kissing him, he felt good. He didn't get aroused any further, as was expected, but he wanted to keep kissing Archie as long as he could.

They moved in a mirror, Jughead tilting his head right while Archie tilted left. Eventually Archie sat up a bit so that he was hovering over top of Jughead, kissing him with newfound strength from this angle.

It could've been minutes, it could've been hours. Either way, Jughead's lips were sore and his lungs were heaving, but he felt better than he had in months.

They slept holding hands, and when Jughead woke up the next morning, tucked in the curve of Archie's neck and shoulder, to the sound of Archie quietly singing November Rain, he felt more normal than he had his whole life.

 

\---

 

They returned to Riverdale when the first search party for Jason was sent out, unaware of the mystery about to unfold upon their small town.

Archie walked Jughead to his doorstep, helping him carry all his things inside. Before he left he cradled Jughead's face in his hands and kissed him for the seventeenth time that day.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" Archie asked, but it was more of a promise.

"Definitely," Jughead replied, and he kissed Archie back, quick and chaste.

The jalopy grumbled on out of the driveway, and Jughead watched it roll down the street, and out of sight. And the whole time, he just couldn't stop smiling.


End file.
